philosophical ramblings in my letters to friends

Mi amiga,

Was really interested to read your letter! I don't think that it's so terrible that love is what motivates you to continue to live, better than chasing money and accumulating it needlessly as some people do. This life is but transient, and sometimes it's hard to convince yourself that anything really matters in the grand scheme of things.(someone lent me Nausea by Sartre over the Christmas period,which momentarily convinced me of the utter futility of everything)- but it is those strong feelings and emotional connections- love in a word- that make life beautiful and worthwhile.

I enjoyed reading what you told me about Berdyaer's theory! It's very true that people re-create feelings, instead of allowing what is within them to express itself. That's why it makes me want to run away from romantic relationships when the guy starts with all these displays and declarations of love- it all just seems so phony to me. Can one not love quietly and truly without the need to use insincere words?

You say that you have always known that all the friends, even the ones in your heart, will vanish. It's true that memory is a brilliant thing, but are memories, faded and distorted with nostalgia, enough  to keep your heart beating? I guess that's why old people, whose friends have all passed away, plunge themselves into memory, nostalgia and anecdotes so much- we find it boring to listen to, but they need it to keep living.

So... what have I been up to? Nothing too special really, but I've been enjoying it here, I enjoy interacting with the college students on a teacher-student level and being able to help them progress in English, but also just chatting to them and finding out about their opinions and lives is a pleasure.

The young ones at the primary school are also dead sweet, and have a bizarre affection for me. It seems they have a certain love for their teacher, as if she were a secondary mother. Children are great because their feelings are so raw and sincere, and they'll often just say exactly what they think without the need or even ability to conceal who they really are.

The other Sunday, I was wandering in a little park and sat in a tree on my lonesome, smoking a cigarette, when another wanderer passed by and said hello. He introduced himself and we ended up having a stroll alongside the river together. He's about fourty, lives in a camper van and survives from giving drum lessons, and nomadically wandering around France, working on farms.

We mostly chatted about how he keeps healthy and tries to live in harmony with nature. I do love these old hippies. He had well long hair was giving me advice about how to avoid split ends- lol!

Well I'll finish up here, take care, love from......

getting all teary over that War Horse film

Here's another update- not sure what to write about. I've been wasting a lot of time watching films and tv series, perhaps i should do a review of a few of them?

War Horse film- or Cheval de Guerre in French

I was quite chuffed to get to see this at an avant-premier, before the rest of France. Had to pay fifteen euros and half of that went to charity. It was dubbed into French, but i don't think it lost any of the original charm because of that.
The film begins by introducing us to a poor farming family in Devon who are struggling to make ends meet. The father has a bit of a drink problem, and the mother is all worn out with hard-work. The father recklessly bids on a handsome brown horse and ends up blowing all their money. So far, so fairy-tale formulaic.
 The horse is somewhat uselsess because it is young and completely untrained. It will take a lot of work to make it ready for ploughing the fields. The mother is angry and tries to get her husband to take the horse back and get their money back, but alas, their startlingly good looking and sensitive son has already fallen in love with it, and sets about breaking it in, with firmness and compassion for the animal.
It is clear that they have a special bond, but alas, we see all this swept aside by the destructive inevitability of war which comes to wreak havoc on the best laid plans.
We follow the horse as it is sold and taken to France, to fight in the first world war as a War Horse. It's owners change, and it is cast about from place to place in the turmoil of war- being owned by the British cavalry division, a couple of deserting German brothers, a little French girl and her grandfather, and so on.
You'll have to watch it if you want to find out if the horse ever gets re-united with it's original owner- the farmer's son who has never been able to forget his horse, and who signed up to become a soldier partly motivated by the desire to find his equine friend.
I would say it's definitely worth a watch, and is interesting from a historical point of view, as well as for the story which is gripping and epic, as grand and sweeping as the beautiful Devon countryside. You might end up sobbing as well, I've heard that the film had this effect on some people. Not me though, I don't cry over no films.